Is Jesus on TikTok?: A Social Media Study (Pt. 2)

Lesson 2: Commenting on posts and interacting with others

Questions to consider:

How often do you comment on social media posts? All the time? Or just when you feel strongly about what the post is saying? Why?

On a scale of 1-10, 1 being extremely difficult and 10 being second nature, how would you rate your ability to respond with kindness even when you disagree with a post?

The book of Proverbs has A LOT to say about the wise keeping their mouth shut. Don’t believe me? Here are just a few verses:

• Proverbs 10:19 - When words are many, sin is not absent, but he who holds his tongue is wise.

• Proverbs 11:12 - A man who lacks judgment derides his neighbor, but a man of understanding holds his tongue.

• Proverbs 17:28 - Even a fool is thought wise if he keeps silent, and discerning if he holds his tongue.

• Proverbs 18:13 - He who answers before listening - that is his folly and his shame.

• Proverbs 29:11 - A fool gives full vent to his anger, but a wise man keeps himself under control.

You’ve no doubt heard the saying, “God gave us two ears and one mouth for a reason.” Unfortunately, he also gave us fingers we often use to type very hurtful things on the internet. If you have ever seen a post that’s even somewhat controversial, I’m sure you know the second you look in the comment section you’ll fall down a pit of vulgar language, name-calling, and groups of people ganging up on others that disagree with them.

It's sad, but it’s reality. People don’t want to hear from people on the opposite side, no matter the issue. I’d argue much of it is because they aren’t used to having a civilized conversation in which the goal isn’t to be right but to see things from the other person’s point of view. No one said you had to agree with every single person you come across, and that’s the focus of this part of our lesson on social media. It boils down to the simple saying your mother or father likely taught you growing up: If you can’t type anything nice, don’t type anything at all.

Questions to consider:

When was the last time you got into a “comment war” with someone on social media? What were you arguing about, and do you think you changed the person’s mind? Why or why not?

Be honest: Have you ever posted something you knew was likely to cause a ruckus on purpose? What reaction were you aiming for, and did you accomplish your goal?

Everyone has an opinion. We’re human and can’t help it. No one enjoys being wrong, and often no one wants to admit it even if they know they are. When we have a true, pure intention of helping someone who we believe to be incorrect, there’s a very Christian way to do it. If you must, I recommend taking the Matthew 18:15 approach:

“If your brother or sister sins, go and point out their fault, just between the two of you. If they listen to you, you have won them over.”

To make a true impact on someone, you have to speak to them in a way that will encourage them to listen. When was the last time you felt loved and heard after someone got done cursing you out? Galatians 6:1 says, “…if someone is caught in a sin, you who live by the Spirit should restore that person gently.” GENTLY. That doesn’t mean dragging them through the court of public opinion. Open up a direct message. Send them an email or text, or give them a call if they are someone close to you. Don’t embarrass them in front of the entire internet.

If they come back and bite your head off, remember this verse: “Warn a divisive person once, and then warn them a second time. After that, have nothing to do with them. You may be sure that such people are warped and sinful; they are self-condemned” (Titus 3:10-11). God doesn’t need you to do his work for Him. If you must confront someone, don’t keep harassing them after they’ve clearly shown they have no interest in your point of view.

If you’re like me, you might find choosing silence is the best answer. Not every “wrong” needs “righting.” If you cherish your friendships, it’s probably the best course of action to let it be. You can still be friends with someone who sees things differently than you, but probably not if you call them derogatory names sprinkled with expletives.

Questions to consider:

Have you ever lost a friend due to a social media argument? Have you tried to reconcile with them since?

Do you have a specific way you handle online disagreements that has worked well for you?

If you absolutely feel the need to respond somehow, a third option is to let “reactions” like emoji and “like” buttons do the talking for you. If you see a post on Facebook that makes you sad, just click the “cry” reaction. Don’t feel a need to explain why you feel the way you do. I promise you won’t self-destruct if you keep your novel-length opinion that no one is going to read anyway to yourself, but you may if you do post it and it blows up in your face. A simple “like” or “love” can show solidarity with a person who may be facing some heated comments – but you don’t need to step in and get involved in the back-and-forth. If you want to offer them kind words of encouragement, please do so privately so you don’t get sucked into a black hole of hatred.

I implore you to remember nothing is ever “gone” or “deleted.” You can even block people from profiles and they will still find ways to get around it. Just because you aren’t “friends” with your boss doesn’t mean they don’t know someone who knows someone who knows you. Despite the earthly consequences of being not-so-nice on social media, the one you should really be thinking about is God. He desires us to bring people closer to Him, not push them away. Think of it like this: If He had a social media profile, would He want to be on your friend list?

Challenge Activity

Let’s make some changes for good. If you feel up to it, the next time you see a post you REALLY want to respond to in an unkind way, I challenge you to instead ask the person what you can pray about for them. If they don’t respond, simply ask God to work in their heart and help them however they may need it.