The Freedom of “Yes”

Rather listen to this blog? Listen to “The Freedom of ‘Yes’.”

Confession time: I am a perfectionist. If I take something on, I pour myself into it until I make sure every single detail is exactly right.

It’s a habit I’m trying to break. Outsiders may look on and think I am competent, or they may be impressed with the quality of work I do (to be fair, they may also just think it’s overkill).

The truth is, though, I look at my work and see the hundreds of ways I messed up or missed a chance to do something better. I can appreciate holistically that I might have done a satisfactory job, but it is rarely the perfect product I had in my head.

Also, trying to be perfect is exhausting. That’s the bit I like to leave out. Sure, the work is good, but the toll on my energy and health is high. All those details take tons of time. Tons.

I finish projects wiped out. At some point, I stop enjoying them, and I just slug through to finish.

For many years, I thought I was doing things the right way. I aced school. My bosses were always pleased and held me up as an example. My inner judge, though, was rarely impressed. I could always see how someone else was more creative, artsier, or had looked at things differently than I did. Then, I would feel sad and defeated that I didn’t see or approach the project in that way. This was for an A+ project!

This false idol of “perfection” I was chasing also led to me being very reluctant to take on anything I felt God was asking me to do.

That may seem like a non-sequitur, but hear me out.

I don’t like feeling like I’m less than perfect. Since in reality I’m FAR from perfect, it’s a feeling I get to face pretty often.

So, when God would ask me to do something, let’s say a Bible study, for example, my thought process would go something like this:

            I don’t know enough about the bible to lead that. What if I don’t know an answer or say something wrong and someone calls me on it? Then, everyone will know I don’t know enough. To make sure I do know enough, I’m going to have to study hours each week to prepare. What if the conversation diverges into an area I didn’t prepare for? I can’t possibly study everything that might come up in discussion. I’m exhausted already. There must be someone else who knows more and can do a better job.

Sound familiar?

If you have felt this way or responded to God as I have in the past, let me tell you there is hope.

It is simple yet hard. It is also beautiful.

Just say “Yes.”

Just try telling God “yes” and then trust He knows what He is doing (Spoiler: He does).

I cannot tell you the freedom that comes in trusting God. The burden of the perfection I was never going to reach was heavy. Since I started saying “yes” whenever God asked me to take a step of faith, I don’t have to waste time doubting myself. I already know I can do nothing. I know nothing. I have no power or influence - none that matter.

But I can trust God will come through. I can trust he has chosen me for a particular purpose and he will be faithful to fulfill that purpose.

All this time, I made a false idol of perfection (really of myself, I guess). I tried to do things in my own ability and wisdom, which is nothing in comparison to God’s perfection.

For at least the last year, my response when I feel the Spirit guiding me to a new endeavor is to just say “yes.”

Teach a Bible study? Yes. I trust God will give me the words to say and bring the right scripture to mind. I’ll study, of course, but it will be a time of joy, spent with my savior rather than stressing about getting all the answers right.

Write a blog about Jesus? Yes. I trust He has brought me to this group at just the right time and some readers need to see what He wants me to write. If they think I’m weird, pushy, or awkward, that’s okay too. You already know I’m those things, and you want me anyway.

Start a life group? Yes! I have no clue where we will have it or if anyone will come, but I don’t have to worry about those things. I trust you to take care of those details.

Here’s the cool thing. The more I have practiced saying “yes,” the easier trusting God has become because every single time I have said “yes,” He has done amazing things – things I NEVER could have done or even thought possible.

The Lord says to Paul in 2 Corinthians 12:9, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.”

Unlike our own power, God’s really is perfect, and there is something beautiful when an imperfect, broken person allows God’s perfection to shine through her.

Let God have your weakness. Give him your doubts and imperfections. He knows all about them already, but still, He calls you. You.

Let that sink in.

He wants YOU. Warts and all.

Introvert or extrovert.

Type A or B.

YOU.

It doesn’t matter if you aren’t ready or you don’t feel you have the skill set. If God has called, then you are perfect for the job He has for you.

I hope you will say “yes.”

I hope you will trust God to show his perfection in your weakness.

I hope you will feel the freedom of surrendering to God instead of the idol of self.

God will call you.

Start practicing your “yes” now, and start down the road to the freedom of trusting God.