The ‘Surface Pressure’ of Work

My son loves Disney’s new movie Encanto, and I have to say it’s been a nice break from Paw Patrol. If you’ve missed out, the movie is about a magical Colombian family, wherein almost every member has been gifted through a miracle with a different power: Strength, hearing, healing, power over nature, weather, animals, etc. The trouble comes when the family miracle/magic starts fading, and Mirabel, the only family member to not have a gift, is tasked with saving the family.

Besides some pretty amazing music courtesy of Lin-Manuel Miranda, the movie is full of interesting characters, family dynamics, and corresponding lessons, but I am struck most by Luisa’s story. I’ve seen several posts in the last few weeks about how much this super buff, gladiator-like woman has resonated with audiences. She breaks the traditional Disney princess mold, sure, and that’s cool, especially for young girls who need to see they can be strong.

For me, though, Luisa serves as a reminder of the biggest chink in my faith armor. I may not have her muscles and physical strength, but in so many ways, I identify with Luisa’s plight. Because she is so physically strong, everyone assumes she can shoulder all the things. Her song “Surface Pressure” has her hopping from one crazy task straight to another. Move a church? Sure. Reroute a river? No problem. Realign a house? Done. Catch some stray donkeys? On it. Her to-do list, much like my own, is unending.

On the outside, she is thriving. She feels useful, like she has value, but only insofar as she can complete her work. It isn’t until her sister Mirabel prods a bit that Luisa confesses in song, “I’m pretty sure I’m worthless if I can’t be of service.” That hits home.

Luisa is a workaholic, and I would venture this is the reason she clicks with so many of us. It’s not even entirely her fault. Everyone sees her strength, and they assume she can handle it. She feels the very real pressure to meet the needs/requests/demands of those around her. They ask and ask, and she complies and complies. She never says no. The problem isn’t in her desire to help. She is doing good work and serving others. Her “job” in the community is invaluable. She does it well. She seemingly handles the load with ease. It LOOKS light as a feather. However, she has tied her self-worth to her ability to DO things for others, in effect, to her job. It’s not a joy for her; it’s a strain and one that she hides. But she still keeps DOING all the things, and the pressure builds.

I’m a doer, too. I hate telling anyone no. ANYONE. I will take on all the projects at work, all the chores at home, and all the volunteer needs at church. I will go and go and go until things just topple.

On the surface, I appear fine. The work I’m doing is good. I firmly believe my career is a calling. God called me to be a teacher, and he’s gifted me uniquely for that role. It’s not my job that is wrong - after all, we are all “Working for Jesus.”

I do an okay job keeping house. Most of the time the dishes are done and the floors are clean. Toys get picked up, and all kinds of things that have no business being organized are organized. It’s not cleaning my house that’s the problem.

As believers, we are supposed to serve. It’s what we are called to do as Christians. So, I’m on the committees. I attend the board meetings. I help with the children’s program. I lead our missions team. Even so, it isn’t serving others that is flawed.

Here’s the thing: Busyness is a sneaky idol. It parades around as goodness. How can the work God called me to do be an idol? I’m doing what HE made me to do. He tells me to work at whatever I do as if I’m serving him (Colossians 3:23). So, bring it on.

I’m supposed to be a good steward of all God gave me, so I need to work harder to take care of my house.

There is no doubt I should help do whatever needs doing at church. Ephesians 4:12 states we are “equipped” specifically for the “work of ministry.” These are all admirable works.

The problem isn’t in the tasks themselves, you see. The problem is in our attitude toward them. This is how busyness sneaks in and takes over. It isn’t found in just one thing. It’s found in all the collective things you choose to do that eclipse your time to the point you have no room for prayer or Bible reading. It’s found in being short with your family and giving them no attention because you're so stressed from your week’s list of events. It’s in finding your value in the praise you get for a job well done or a thank you instead of in God's love for you.

I have been a workaholic in pretty much every area of my life. Give me something to do, and I can get so laser-focused that I will pursue it to the detriment of my own health.

To give you an example, here is a real-life picture of my planner for August. Now, take into account that volleyball season is the busiest time of the year in our home because my husband coaches. While not all my months look this busy (though September and October certainly do), I usually have no problem filling an empty space. Taking time to “Slow Down” doesn’t enter into the equation.

What you see here represents many things I didn’t choose. Everything in light blue is volleyball - a game or a tournament. Those take up every Tuesday, Friday, and Saturday in August. If it’s green, it’s something for my son. Some are school things, but others are choices like piano lessons (Weds) and Tae Kwon Do (Thurs). Purple denotes days I have major school responsibilities. I don’t have much say on those. Pink represents other responsibilities I’ve taken on. They are GOOD things: writing this blog, for example, or doing a Bible study with some of my husband’s volleyball girls.

Keep in mind that on top of everything written in my planner, I also work full time. It’s a crazy, ridiculous, and stupid schedule. That time of year, I don’t get to choose what is on my calendar. Still, I find myself taking on assignments at work that I don’t have to take on. I spend way more time creating lessons than I have to. I stress when I don’t get every single thing on my to-do list done or every paper graded.

Like Luisa, it leaves me drained. There are days I tell myself I can’t even stop for a minute. Sitting down on the couch equals laziness or neglect. The prospect of not having something done, missing an obligation, or having to tell someone my plate is too full, feels devastating. I stress about the dishes that need doing. I stress about the dinner menu. I stress about what my son will bring to show and tell, and making sure I send reminders to the other parents, because, of course, I’m room mom.

In these seasons of my life, the work becomes my master, and it is cruel, unforgiving, and impossible to please.

I will work along blindly, focusing only on the tasks ahead, forgetting all about the God who called me to the task at hand. In these scenarios, it usually takes a collapse (because, also like Luisa, my strength alone is never enough to shoulder all the burdens of this life) to remind me God is there waiting to carry the heavy load for me. That the whole time, as I’ve been stressing and miserable, he’s been whispering over and over, “Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light” (Matthew 11: 28-30).

I must be pretty thick-headed because this one lesson - how to serve God without becoming a workaholic - doesn’t seem to stick. I’ll get so wrapped up in the events of my planner and my obligations, all of which I’m supposed to be doing in service to God, when I realize it’s been a week since I prayed or opened my Bible. The load I’m carrying will get so heavy, it collapses, and only then will I remember God’s promise to give me rest, to give me peace. And He does. Until I start picking more things up and stacking them on my own shoulders again.

What good is it to do things for God if in doing them, you distance yourself from him?

I love Luisa at the end of Encanto. She loses her super strength for a bit, but in that time, she finds she is valuable regardless of what she can do. In the final ensemble, her strength is returned, and though we see her start to do some heavy lifting, she stops herself and, instead, lies back on a hammock and rests.

Like Luisa, I have been learning (slowly, I’ll grant you) to guard my time where I can. We’ve cut out some unnecessary items from our agenda, yes, but it’s more than that. It’s remembering that even when the busyness hits - and it will - that I still serve the God of peace. It’s being okay with the dishes sitting a bit longer in the sink, and it’s taking time off in the evenings to connect with my family and to rest. It’s making everything else wait until I spend time with God in the morning. It’s recognizing when the stress of the day is robbing me of joy and stepping away. It’s letting go of my own desire for perfection when a passing job is all that’s needed.

Even when our schedules are out of our hands and obligations pull us in a million directions, we still get to choose whom we will serve.

We choose if we find our value in the things we do or in the one for whom we do them.

Even though the world may idolize working 55-hour weeks, taking work home over the weekends, missing family events, and doing whatever it takes to succeed at tasks, God doesn’t see things like this.

When God sent Samuel to look for a new king, Samuel first saw one of Jesse’s older sons who looked the part of king. God, who was leading Samuel to David, rejected the other sons and told Samuel he “does not look at the things people look at. People look at the outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart” (1 Samuel 16:7).

God doesn’t judge you by the bottom line, your client base, your spotless kitchen, your win-loss record, how many committees you serve on, or the depth of your stack of papers waiting to be graded.

He looks at your heart. Is your heart looking back at him or your to-do list?